Never Like This
by Cadela
Summary: Daikeru. Daisuke runs away and spends a month on the streets before he realizes he made a big mistake, and has to scrape the remains of a relationship off the ground and attempt to fix everything. PG-13 for language, yaoi. Angsty and a little stupid.
1. Going Away

_Brand new series, but it's going to be really short. Only three or four parts... and most likely this will be finished this week. I'm inspired to write this. I'm inspired to run away._

_Anyway... this is all from Daisuke's point of view. Some of it doesn't make sense, but neither does he. He tends to not go into detail on lots of things that really could use some and rambles on things that don't matter._

_There's also a new thing I've just opened... it's a journal for Daisuke, whoo-hoo. It's on livejournal, and it's found here - - I'll be updating it with short ramblings that don't belong in stories (this would go there if it weren't over ten pages...) and also lots of raging about problems I've found in fanfics. He'll make comments on Japanese culture, also... as I learn more and more Japanese and more about their culture, I always have weird thoughts about it, so I'll put them in there. It may be informative or it may just be amusing. Either way, if you're interested in poking at it, go ahead. It's just my boredom toy._

_Anyways, disclaimer: I don't own Digimon or any of the characters, but I do own this story. Please don't steal it or alter it or copy it or et cetera. This fic includes weirdness, what could be depression but really isn't, and yaoi. (Daikeru/Takedai.)_

I ran away from home three weeks before I turned eighteen.

The best and worst choice I ever made. For starters, I was finally free from my parents and their arguing, their treating me like an object, forcing me to pick sides and then holding it over the head of the opposite spouse. Freedom from parents is something most people just don't need as badly as I did. Some need it more so. But other people think 'freedom from parents' means having mommy and daddy pay to send him off to some expensive college where he'll snuggle up in a cozy dorm. But no, my freedom was nothing like that.

Instead I was stuck on the street, starving for some real food, freezing cold, and tired because it was too cold to get good sleep.

I had three hundred dollars to my name. My last paycheck from work was cashed instead of depositing half of it like I usually do. Unfortunately, I couldn't withdraw everything from my account because I wasn't eighteen yet, and there's a set amount you can withdraw at a time. I also wasn't going to access my account after I left – I was terrified if I used an ATM my parents would somehow track me down. Call me paranoid, but I really didn't want to be found.

Every kid I know has a story about how they ran away when they were six to their best friends house or something. I didn't do that. I didn't go to Takeru, or Hikari, or Taichi or Yamato or any of my friends. None of them knew I would be disappearing and not coming back for who knows how long. The only person I told was my boss, Jay J. I told him I had to quit because I wasn't going to be around. He didn't ask me about it. He only told me whenever I wanted my job back, he'd be glad to give it back to me.

I vanished. I made sure of it. One night I just went into my room, packed all of my clothes I could fit into a bag, my wallet, my toothbrush and electric razor so I could at least shave and maintain some cleanliness, a pack of batteries, and my digivice. And then I left at 3 in the morning when the apartment was silent and dark.

I ran away to Tokyo.

I don't know why I went to Tokyo. Originally, I was planning on living in the Kyoto prefecture. I guess it's because there's so much poverty and so many homeless people in Tokyo I figured I would fit right in. I decided not to go to the Shinjuku station because that's where every homeless person is. Instead I prowled my way around to find something more... creative, I guess.

I found my place on a street corner deep in the middle of downtown, on the stoop of an abandoned old building. There was writing all over the walls of this place. Graffiti. I don't even know why I stopped there, but it was home now. Curled up against this building, dark and unforgiving streets all around me, I had probably five layers of clothing on and I was still cold. If only I had been born in July instead of December. Then I'd have run away in June instead of late November, when everything was getting freezing cold.

First I wanted to get work. I need to get a job and then I could find an apartment. Unfortunately, it's extremely hard to get work when I didn't have a place to stay, or even a phone number I could be reached at. I did have my cellphone with me, but again, I just didn't want to use it because I was afraid of being hunted down and dragged back home. Extremely paranoid.

I spent two weeks on that lousy street corner, and every night I lay there and closed my eyes and thought that by the next morning I would either have starved to death or froze. I would place bets on which it would be. I think I was pretty delirious or something, or maybe I was just bored.

After the first several days, I started to get really sick. I wasn't eating right, I was freezing my ass off constantly, and I wasn't living in the cleanest situation at all. That wouldn't have been a problem if it kept me warm, but instead of feeling how hot I really was, I felt freezing cold. I was so sick I couldn't even cough. I'd try to, but it would only come out as a gasp.

I drug myself into a corner store and bought some cold medicine and aspirin. Neither helped and I only felt worse, slumped on that stupid porch, wanting to cough and sneeze and vomit all at the same time and not able to do any of them.

On the second day of my sickness, I realized that I had a serious problem. I wasn't getting better, and I hadn't slept since initially being ill (on top of the lack of sleep I had beforehand). My fever was getting worse and my vision was starting to get blurry. I was really, really sick.

I needed a doctor.

I had just over two hundred dollars left, and no clue how much it costs to go to the doctor without insurance. With my dad's health insurance, it's ten dollars a visit. Without that, who knows what it would cost?

I dragged off the stairs and started looking for a hospital anyway. I didn't have a choice – if I stayed this sick much longer, I'd die.

It cost me about eighty dollars to sit in a freezing cold room and have them poke at me and jab me and diagnose me with hypothermia. Well, that's why I was so cold I guess. Anyway, they gave me a whole load of instructions on getting warmed up, and they wanted to keep me in the hospital for a night. Unfortunately, I didn't have the money for that. So I left. I put on a few extra layers of clothing and headed off to a coffee shop where I poured thirty dollars worth of warm tea into me. Apparently, this was supposed to help. I took an aspirin and slouched down in my seat, staring dizzily at the steam from my cup.

By closing time, I felt better, but decided I needed to find somewhere warm to stay for a night or two. I made a pretty bad decision, but it was the only one I could think of: I spent three nights in a bathroom stall of a subway station. It smelled and it was so vile and dirty, but it was warm. And when I puked the next day, I didn't even have to move.

I stayed in the bathroom until I didn't feel sick anymore and went back to my porch, deciding to try and keep as warm as possible and take cold medicine all the time to ward off anything else that wanted to attach to me.

The third week began to set in and everything was so bad I almost burst into tears and just dragged myself back home. December 4th. It snowed. I woke up and everything was dusted with white, and the stuff was still coming down. It was so cold I couldn't fall asleep again and dragged myself, and my bag with all my shit in it, off that damned porch and started wandering.

I went to Shinjuku Station.

I had no intent of staying there. I didn't want to. I just wanted to see. I prowled around that entire area, first taking in the east side. It was typical upper class Japan, those beautiful tall office buildings, modern and sparkling clean. Staring up at those tall buildings, one of which looked like a high-rise apartment complex, I got that feeling... the feeling that I wanted to go home. I wanted to go home and sleep in my own bed, feel carpet under my bare feet, take a long hot shower in my own bathroom...

By now I had walked along this platform to the east side, and I swear it was like walking into another world. There were all these... cardboard boxes. It was like if Cardboard Boxes R Us was a real store, this is what it would look like. But they weren't ugly, beat up things... no. There were all these fantastic boxes with gorgeous paintings on them. They're cardboard boxes, sure, but so many of them are decorated and they just look beautiful.

Me, I didn't even have a box. I just had a street corner.

Of course not all the boxes were so nice and they all weren't glamorous. Street life in Tokyo isn't all that grand. But as I stood there, admiring this cardboard breeding ground, I realized that half these people must have had jobs, but just couldn't afford the expensive housing costs. It occurred to me that I had been planning on getting work and then an apartment... what a dumbass I was. I couldn't afford an apartment here. Odaiba apartments were affordable. This... this place... was not.

Wandering out of the station, feeling angry and frustrated and above all, fucking cold and starved, I dragged off to a payphone and stood in front of it, arguing inside my head about if I should call my parents or not. I picked it up. I dialed nearly all the numbers. But in the end I hung up and decided I should just go back to that damn porch. I'd probably end up sick again, and this time I had even less cash and would most likely end up dead. But at least I'd be dead instead of cold.

I wound up at a homeless center instead of dead or on the porch. Bullshit for a homeless center, this place cost fifty bucks to sleep and get fed each week. By now, I had maybe thirty dollars left on me. I couldn't afford that. I drug myself in anyway, just to get warm.

I almost ran into this woman as I slunk around, trying not to be noticed. Well, she noticed me, and started drilling me with questions. Didn't take long before she found out I wasn't really supposed to be there. I almost made a run for it, figuring I'd be thrown out or worse. Instead, probably the best thing possible happened.

She offered me a job. A job handing out food to these people, these people just like me (except they were better off, they could afford fifty bucks a week). And on top of that, she also offered me a place to stay. Warm, dry, and surrounded by food. I swear I nearly had an orgasm just thinking about it.

It wasn't all that it could have been, really. My room was about the size of my bathroom back home, with this little hard cot on the floor, and one blanket. Not much of a bed at all, but it was better than concrete. The food was disgusting, bland, and most of the time I wouldn't be able to eat until after everyone else was fed, and it would be cold. So I was still pretty cold and hungry at nights.

But fuck all if I complained. I had work and a place to stay. I wasn't on that god-forsaken porch anymore.

_Okay, next chapter gets real plot. Feh._


	2. Coming Home

_Daisuke is such a moron._

_Disclaimer: Characters & Digimon not mine, story is, please refrain from stealing. R&R, or if you'd rather drop me an e-mail I'm at _

_Have fun seeing how Daisuke attempts to drag his ass back home... and finally gives in and gets help. _

The last of my cash was used on my birthday. December 13th. I went to the Laundromat and washed all my clothes. I went to the corner store and bought a pack of cigarettes (which I hadn't had since a few days before I ran away – I was quitting cold turkey because I knew I couldn't afford any), a Jones soda, more batteries for my razor, a cookie, a candle, and a lighter (my birthday cake, you see) and a bottle of aspirin. Then I used the rest of my change to call Takeru.

I remember the scene exactly. I was standing on the street, freezing cold because I only had one sweatshirt (the rest were still being washed) and it was snowing like fuck. The phone rang endlessly. I waited and waited and begged the phone to pick up. It didn't. Takeru wasn't home.

For the first time, it occurred to me what I'd done. I ran away from home without telling my boyfriend that I was leaving. I left him, without a word. For three weeks. What had happened to him? Was he okay? He probably hated me! Or even worse, he thought I was dead! What if _he_ was dead?! I'd never know! Fuck, my boyfriend could be six feet down and I'd be blissfully unaware, smoking a cigarette and humming Happy Birthday To Me over a fucking chocolate chip cookie!

I resolved to go back.

And then I remembered that I had just spent all my cash, save maybe three dollars, on cigarettes and laundry.

I had a breakdown on the street. I slumped down to the snowy ground and finally burst into tears that I'd been holding back since I left. Three weeks of tears rolling down my face and I was sobbing, not even trying to stop them. People walked past me, avoiding me. Nobody asked if I was okay. Nobody cared. Who were these people? Why was I here? What the fuck had I done?

I stayed there until I couldn't cry anymore. I remember somebody even used the payphone while I was still leaning against it and bawling. Numb from the cold and all sorts of regret and fear of how selfish I had been, I went back and got all my clothes out of the wash. I shoved them in the drier and sat down in a plastic chair, shivering and sniffling for an hour until they finished.

I went back to that shelter. I packed everything. I slipped into the kitchen and stole lunch and dinner, and a bottle of teriyaki sauce that I dumped out and filled with water.

And, once again, I vanished.

Now I was homeless and cold and broke. (At least I wasn't starving.) The only difference was now I was determined to get home. How the hell I was going to do that, honestly I had no idea.

I guess I got it in my mind to walk, as I just started... well, walking. What a stupid idea that was. Odaiba is near the Osaka prefecture, and Tokyo is probably around 250 miles from it – and that's as the crow flies. In reality I'd probably have to go 300 miles or so. How could I have ever thought I could walk that?

I ended up in Akiruno, still in the Tokyo prefecture. About this time it was starting to sink in how stupid this was and that I was just being stupid. I dragged myself to a coffee shop and sat down inside to warm up. I couldn't feel my toes or my fingers or various other parts of my body anymore, so, well, I figured it would be better to sit down for a while and risk being kicked out than to just resign myself to freezing to death.

I didn't get kicked out because I ordered myself a café mocha. Down to two dollars and thirty-seven cents, I debated bagels until I decided to starve as much as I could until I simply couldn't stand it anymore instead of wasting more cash. It was down to this. Debating if I should eat now, or be hungry a while longer and keep what little money I had.

Now I wanted to go back to the homeless shelter and collapse on that little cot on the floor and give up everything. I wasn't going to make it home. I couldn't. There's no possible way, unless someone miraculously showed up to drive me back.

Wait.

Unfortunately, my cell phone battery was dead and had been for two and a half weeks. I decided to embarrass myself (not like I had any pride left at this point) and begged the waitress to let me use their business phone.

I was either extremely pitiful or extremely cute, because she let me. And I called the only person I could think of who might actually be crazy enough to drive all that way just to drag me back home.

And by the grace of God, he actually answered.

"Yamato?"

"Yeah. Wait. Daisuke?"

I swear I nearly burst into tears again. I probably would have if I hadn't still been dried up from earlier. It'd been so long since I heard a familiar voice saying that name. Mostly I heard it once or twice, from a potential employer, way back when I just started out alone. I gave the homeless shelter a fake name so no one would be able to hunt me down. And finally, someone I knew was on the line and calling me by my name.

"Yamato... I need..."

"Where the fuck are you, Daisuke? Where the fuck have you _been?_ We've all been worried sick and now you're just calling me up like – where the hell are you? Are you okay?"

"Well... I'm okay."

"Well praise God for that. Motomiya Daisuke, you could have been killed or... or... or who knows what could have happened! I'd almost been convinced you were dead. Where_ are_ you?"

"Um, currently in a diner in A-Akiruno."

"...Akiruno?"

"In the Tokyo prefecture."

"Yeah, Daisuke, I know where Akiruno is, we've done concerts there. Why the hell are you there? Why the hell are you in Tokyo? How did you _get_ there?"

"Yamato."

"...Sorry. Okay. What's the matter? Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yamato, I ran away. And now I want to come home."

Silence on the other end.

"I have less than three bucks. And I'm in Akiruno. Yamato... I don't know what the fuck to do and you were the only person I could think of to call." I was begging already and I hadn't even formally asked him to come get me. God, I've turned into such a wuss. He already knows what I want though.

He sighed and I could picture him, rubbing his temples with one hand the way he always does when he gets frustrated at me and tries to be patient. "Okay. Where are you? Specifically. Give me a street name or the name of the restaurant or anything."

Again with the practically bawling. "Thank you so much Yamato. I swear to God I'll pay you back for gas and everything. I swear to God."

"It's okay, Daisuke. It's okay. Just tell me where you are. I'll bring you home."

It took him three and a half hours to drive to Akiruno, and I sat in that diner for the entire time, staring down the road waiting. The lady that let me use the phone gave me a couple of free refills... she was really nice. She reminded me of my mom, sort of. When my mom wasn't being a bitch, that is.

And then there he was. I saw the car coming down the road and nearly started tearing around the restaurant in excitement. I gave the waitress the rest of my cash and thanked her about thirty times, then bounded out the door.

Yamato stepped out of the car and he fixed me with a look about three times as stern as he'd sounded over the phone. I stopped bounding. Not cool. He was probably furious with me, even though he came all this way. What if he came all this way just to yell at me and then leave me alone here again? I'd have to see if the waitress lady wanted to adopt a son or something.

But when I reached the car, he flung his arms around me and hugged me. Huge surprise. I dropped my bag and buried my face in his shoulder. My God. I was actually touching someone I knew. Feeling them, smelling them.

I felt like I was home already.

He pulled me away from him and studied me carefully, making sure I was actually okay and hadn't been lying. He wiped tears off my face, tears I didn't even realize were there, and grinned slightly. "You look like hell."

"I've frozen my ass off for the last month, so I've had a constant cold," I defended myself. Hey, if I look like hell there had better be a good reason. "And I wanna go home," I added.

He smiled and ruffled my hair a bit, which probably hadn't been washed for several days (the shelter ran out of hot water pretty quick and I refuse to take cold showers.) "Then get in, and I'll take you home."

Yamato, who I'm now convinced is a god or something, grabbed my bag and shoved it in the backseat, then presented me with a couple of blankets and cranked up the heat. What a smart guy.

Even though I was warm and going home now, I still wasn't completely happy. Yamato bitched me out for the first hour. "Why didn't you say anything to any of us? If you wanted to get away from home, you could have stayed with – hell, you could have stayed with me! I wouldn't have told anybody! Shit, Daisuke, don't do anything like this ever again. We were all really, really scared."

"I'm... sorry..." was the only thing I could even think of to say. "I didn't... think. I wasn't thinking and I wasn't... I'm a dumbass, all right? You should know that by now."

"No, Daisuke," Yamato sighed and softened up a little, "you aren't a dumbass. But you didn't think, you're right. And when you didn't contact any of us... not even Takeru..."

Takeru. "Is, um. Is Takeru all right?"

Yamato shot me a look and then turned back to the road without a word.

"Yamato, is Takeru all right? He's not... he's not _dead,_ is he?"

"No, no. He's not dead."

I sighed in relief and snuggled into the blankets more. "Well, then, he must hate me. But at least he isn't dead."

Yamato said nothing for a few minutes. I leaned back against the seat, snuggled into two blankets with heat on high, blowing straight onto my face. The car ride was so smooth and so calm it was almost cozy enough to make me forget all those freezing nights on the porch.

I fell asleep. I don't know when, and I'm not sure how long I was asleep. But when I woke up, Yamato was pulling into a rest stop and the heat was cranked down. Yawning, I twisted a bit to get out of the blankets enough to stretch. He tossed me a look and grinned. At least he wasn't mad anymore.

Staggering out of the blankets and into the rest stop, I enjoyed my first piss in a restroom closer to home.

Hey, you have to take it one step at a time.

Yamato, being the great guy he is, bought me a can of tea and a candy bar. Whoo-hoo! "Happy Birthday," he grinned.

I'm not complaining. I was very happy. Cracking open my can, I shrugged. "You didn't even have to say happy birthday. This whole thing is the best present anybody could give me. Ever."

"Ah, I'd do it even if it wasn't your birthday," he shrugged a little.

"Want me to drive the rest of the way?" I figured maybe I could make some of it up to him by letting him sleep now.

"Sure."

I missed driving. I wish I had taken my car when I left, but I wouldn't have had anywhere to park it.

The second half of the ride home was typical Daisuke and Yamato togetherness. He turned on the radio and this beautiful punk music I haven't heard since I ran away filled the car. And pretty soon we were both singing at the top of our lungs, and then we started changing the lyrics and insanity ensued. God, it felt good to be back with one of my friends. I got that incredibly home feeling again. My friends. I was going home.

I think I nearly started bouncing by the time we reached the Osaka prefecture and Odaiba was only a short distance away. The only thing keeping me from bouncing about in my seat was the fact that I was driving. (I probably was hyper because of a sugar rush from that candy bar, too, but who knows.)

I didn't go to my apartment. I went to Yamato's. I don't know, I guess I just took it for granted that he wouldn't mind if I crashed there for a while.

"Go shower," was the first thing he told me when I got inside.

Hot water is fantastic. There's so much people take for granted. And shampoo, and conditioner, too. And soap. Ohhhh soap. How I love thee.

After about a thirty minute shower (mental note – give Yamato an extra twenty to cover water bill costs) I was all sweet smelling, fresh, and clean. And Yamato, my hero, was just finishing making dinner.

I haven't eaten so much since Christmas dinner with my grandmother. God, I ate four helpings and I don't even remember what it was. It just tasted so good.

And finally, I was warm, full, and home.

I curled up on the couch for the night and I remember Yamato pulling a blanket over me. Facing Takeru would have to wait until the next day. For now, I was sleeping.

_By the way, depending on how I feel when I finish, this may be Yamasuke... reviewers, tell me how you'd like it to end. I could go Daikeru-Yamasuke-Daikeru, too. Hmm. That would just cause more chapters... I need your feedback! R&R please! Punk homeless Daisuke will love you!_


	3. Back To You

_I'm glad people like this I actually didn't expect it to be as... celebrated. oO Hmm. Oh well, I'm certainly not complaining! I'm glad people like it. I hope this chapter is as good as the last few... Daisuke goes off to find Takeru and, er, finds somebody else, too._

I woke up the next morning to sunlight burning in my eyes. The heater was running and the apartment smelled familiar. I snuggled up on the couch for a while before remembering I had to find my boyfriend and find out if he was even still my boyfriend.

Great.

Slinking around the apartment, I found my clothes and got changed. Yamato was still asleep, so I figured I'd be nice and make breakfast. I'll return the favor and thirty times over, man.

Pancakes are on the table and I'm finishing the eggs when Yamato staggers out of his room. He flops down at the table and yawns, giving me one of those dirty 'I know I look like shit because I just woke up, but don't say anything about it' glares. I beam instead and plop a fried egg on his plate.

I haven't cooked anything for a while besides that bland stuff they made me poke at in the shelter. That wasn't really cooking, anyway. This is real cooking, and I'm happy because I like to cook. And it tastes good, too, so that's even better.

"So where was Takeru yesterday?" I idly mention around a mouthful of pancakes.

Yamato swallows and helps himself to a drink of orange juice before responding. "Eh, out with some friend of his... Otayo or something like that.."

I blinked and stop chewing. After a minute, I remember I have food in my mouth, and swallow. "Otayo? I don't know any Otayo."

Yamato nodded and shrugged a bit. "Me neither, I've never met him. I know they've been hanging around a lot lately, though. Right after you left."

Suddenly I feel cold and dizzy and shove my plate away. I have to swallow hard to keep from vomiting up what I just ate, plus all the dinner I had last night. Shakily rising, I head back over to the couch and sit down. I can hear Yamato asking if I'm okay, but it sounds like I'm underwater.

"Fuck," I mumble, sagging onto the couch and raising a shaking hand to my forehead.

Yamato suddenly pulls my hand from my eyes and puts one hand on my forehead and the other on my cheek. "Are you okay? Daisuke? Are you sick?"

"I..." Swallowing hard, I shake my head. "Did Takeru leave me?"

The blonde tilted his head to the side slightly. "For this Otayo guy?"

"For anybody! Yamato, did Takeru leave me? Does he love me anymore?"

"Of course he loves you," Yamato leans back away from me. "Is that what's wrong?"

"God," I mumble, relaxing slightly. He still loves me. "I'm extremely emotional right now for some reason. I've been so damn whiny lately... I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me."

"You're gonna have a nervous breakdown if you don't be careful," Yamato stood up and went to clear off the breakfast dishes. "Trust me, Daisuke... Takeru isn't exactly happy with you, but he does love you. "

Sinking back against the couch, I sighed. "I didn't even think when I left. I didn't exactly realize that I would be leaving Takeru. For some reason, that thought just didn't occur to me. Not until yesterday, anyway."

"What happened yesterday?"

"I tried to call him and he wasn't home. And suddenly I realized... that I had no idea where he was, and he had no idea where _I_ was, and neither of us had known for a month. I just... got scared." I grinned. "I burst into tears in the middle of the sidewalk."

"Did you really?"

"Yeah. I don't know. I wanted to cry so bad and I finally just broke. It's kind of funny now, actually."

"No it's not."

"Sure it is. I sound like a damn moron when I cry, and here I was in the middle of the sidewalk surrounded by strangers... heh heh heh."

Yamato shot me a look, but I didn't really pay any attention. I don't know why I bother trying to laugh things off around him anymore... he knows when things really bother me. "So are you going to see Takeru?"

"Yeah... I'm going later today."

"You should go pretty soon, he might have plans."

I glanced at the clock. "Maybe I should just call him..."

"Or maybe you should show up at his door after being gone for a month. I'm sure he'd be very glad to see you."

"I hope he is," I mumbled, standing up and stretching. I found my bag and dumped out all of my clothes, trying to pick something that would make me look the way Takeru always used to say I was – sexy and cute at the same time, untouchable but tempting to strip.

I tugged on my old soccer shirt over a long sleeved shirt and slid a zip-up hoodie over it. I decided on the tan cords over blue jeans and stepped back, studying myself in the mirror. It wasn't until now that I realized just how much weight I'd lost. My cords didn't fit anymore. I always wore a belt, but now I seriously needed one. Mildly disturbed, I resolved to weigh myself tomorrow morning and get back up to my normal weight by the end of the year.

Faced with the no longer homeless version of myself echoing back at myself in the mirror, I narrowed my eyes critically. I needed a haircut, and I needed to get some serious sleep to get rid of the bags under my eyes... but at least I looked fairly like myself. I felt like myself, anyway. I stopped to wiggle my toes in the carpet before putting on my socks and boots.

Yamato glanced up from the dishes and raised one eyebrow at me. "Going for that sexy, yet cute, untouchable, but tempting look?"

"Gee, how did you know? Did I pull it off?"

He leaned against the sink and tilted his head to the side. "Yeah. You look good, if... well... thin."

"I know," I frowned. "I think I should be careful when Takeru hugs me, I might stab him with my ribs or something."

"You don't look too bad, really... your clothes just kind of hang more than they really should," he scowled. "Oh well, you can gain the weight back now that you're home."

"That's what I figured."

"Good luck," Yamato called after me as I slid out the door.

I needed it.

I paced the hall in front of Takeru's apartment for a full two minutes before growing the balls to knock. (Re-growing, I guess, although I don't know when the hell I was castrated of my courage.) I waited and waited and finally I figured he wasn't home now, either.

Just before I stepped away to leave, I heard the lock sliding back and the door opened.

And there he was. The guy I was in love with was standing in front of me, shirtless and his hair all messed up. He must have just gotten up. Christ, he looks good in the morning. He always has.

And then those beautiful blue eyes blinked at me a few times before his mouth fell open. "Daisuke."

I nodded.

He didn't move, instead grabbing for the door. "What... where did you... where did you come from?"

"Umm. Well, it's a... long story?" I grinned slightly. Why did he have this look of horror on his face? What was wrong? I didn't look that bad, did I?

"Where were you?" his eyebrows furrowed in confusion, but the horror didn't go away.

"Er. Tokyo. I went to Tokyo."

And suddenly I realized why that horror didn't go away. Something moved inside the apartment and Takeru shot a nervous glance inside.

"Oh my God." Now it was my turn to look horrified.

He didn't just wake up.

He was just...

"Oh my God. Takeru."

He swallowed. "Daisuke, I'm sorry... but... you were gone and..."

"Takeruuuuu," came a whine from inside. "Who is it?"

"It's, um. Just a second." The blonde turned back to me and shifted uneasily. "Daisuke, I'm really really sorry. I didn't know where you were and I wasn't sure if you'd be coming back or... I don't..."

"Takeru?" that whiny voice floated out, but this time it was followed by the person who owned it.

I felt like I'd been punched in the stomach – repeatedly. This guy was taller than me and he was more built than me... he was hotter than me. He grinned lazily at me and put an arm around Takeru. "Takeru, who's this?" he asked, and I didn't notice how he trailed his fingers gently across the blonde's bare chest and scraped a nail over his nipple. Fucking PDA. Just grope him in front of me, why don't you.

"This is, uh, Daisuke. Daisuke, this is Otayo."

I swallowed. "I should go."

"You should," Otayo nodded, wrapping his other arm around Takeru.

If I wasn't numb, I'd have punched him.

I turned and walked off without another word. Takeru was with somebody else now. That's not right. Takeru was mine. Mine. That fucking asshole touched _my_ boyfriend.

Except he isn't my boyfriend anymore.

"Daisuke?"

I turned slowly and looked back at Takeru. Please. Please kick him out and bring me in from the cold and kiss me and tell me it's okay. Please.

"...Happy Birthday."

"My birthday was yesterday, Takeru." He didn't even remember my birthday.

So I left.

_Please R&R. Otayo is a bitch! I don't like him. ¬¬_


	4. Don't Make Me

_Okay, I meant to have this up two nights ago, but ff.n was down. And then last night I got distracted. So, whoops! The next part should be up tomorrow, though. At least it's out now instead of in a month or two like my Evolution updates are. ;_

_Don't forget to R&R. Standard disclaimer still applies. Um. That's, well, that's about it. Enjoy._

I don't know how I got back to Yamato's apartment, because I sure wasn't paying attention to anything anymore. My brain was dead and I just walked on auto-pilot, I guess. The door was still unlocked when I got there, apparently, because I don't remember knocking. I just walked in and kept walking until I reached the couch. And then I stopped and just stared blankly at the wall.

Yamato was watching television and he looked up expectantly. "Oh, no," he sighed when he saw me.

"He's fucking that Potato guy."

"What? Potato guy?" the blonde blinked.

"No, no, not Potato... Otayo." I sat down on the couch and stared at the television.

Yamato turned it off. "What happened?"

I stood up and started fishing around in my pockets until I found the cigarettes I bought yesterday. Praise be to God that I bought these, even if it did make me broke. "I knocked," I start, lighting up and flopping back down on the couch. "Takeru answered and he was half-naked and his hair was all messed up, and I figured, oh, he must have just woken up. And then he looked at me like he was absolutely terrified that I was back, and he didn't move, and he didn't invite me in... and then that fucking Potato came up and _groped him_ right in front of me. And I said I should go and Potato said maybe you should, so... I left." I took a long drag and turned to Yamato. "He doesn't love me," I exhaled.

"No, Daisuke, he does. I know it. I don't know who the hell is Otayo guy is but believe me, he loves you."

"He loves me, but he's fucking someone else?" I snorted, taking another drag. God, I forgot how good nicotine tasted.

Yamato sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I know it doesn't make sense... but Takeru doesn't sleep around like that. That doesn't make any sense by itself."

I snorted again. "Yeah, well, apparently he does now."

"Or maybe you just assume too much."

"Dude, Yamato," I stopped to blow out a lungful of smoke. "The guy wrapped his arms around him and was practically tweaking his nipples – right in front of me."

"It still doesn't mean _he_ was enjoying it or anything. Listen, Daisuke. Every single time I talked to him he'd ask if I heard from you, and then he'd go on and on about how he hoped you were okay. I practically had to slap him to get him to shut up about it. Why would he do that if he doesn't still love you?"

I turned this over in my mind slowly, before I finally shrugged. "Maybe he was just doing what was expected of him."

He sighed in frustration. "Fine. Then explain why he hasn't told me he's dating somebody else."

Waving my hand in the air, I shook my head. "Too easy. He doesn't want you to give him a lecture about why he shouldn't – because of me. If you weren't my friend, he would have told you. But he probably hasn't told _any_ of the rest of the crew because he's afraid everyone is going to be all 'Oh but what about Daisuke?' and he doesn't want to deal with that," I ground out my cigarette viciously in the ashtray on the table.

Yamato frowned. Apparently he was out of arguments. "So what are you going to do now?"

I stood up and stretched. "I'm going to go out to CD Reshop, tell Jay J I'm home and I want my job back, then come back here and get into bed, cry myself to sleep, and pray to God that when I wake up tomorrow I'll either find everything has been a dream or that I've died in my sleep."

"Don't say that, Dais."

"Well why the fuck not? It's true. I hope I get run over by a goddamn bus parade or something on my way out. What the fuck am I doing? Why the fuck am I _here,_ Yamato? I came back here all this way to be with a boyfriend that I don't even _have_ anymore. I should have fucking died on that street corner." I was shaking. I was shaking and I didn't want to be here anymore. I wasn't even sad. I was just... extremely angry. So fucking pissed off at Takeru, at that Potato asshole, at Yamato for telling me Takeru still loved me - at everybody, but mainly myself. What a fucking idiot I am.

Yamato stood up and fixed me with this extremely calm, dark look. I've only seem him seriously pissed off a few times, and he was really mad now. Whoops. I don't know if he was mad at me or Takeru or if he was just sick of having to deal with me or whatever, but he was really mad. He started talking in this really low, calm voice, even though I could tell he was just overflowing with anger at me. "Don't say that. Don't tell me you want to die. I won't let you. You're here because you came back for _friends._ And you still have those. You have all of your friends; you have me, you have Taichi, and Hikari, and Ken, and everyone else. Go get on the phone and call them, they aren't fucking that Potato guy. You only lost Takeru. Don't let yourself go just because of him."

"If I don't have Takeru, I have nothing," I shrugged, turning to leave.

"No! Didn't you listen to me?" he grabbed me by the wrist and pulled hard. "Don't walk out on me."

I hissed. "Let go."

"Not until you sit down and listen to me."

"Let go," I tried to wrench my hand free, but unfortunately, Yamato is a lot stronger than me. And now I was screwed, because I couldn't leave. He dragged me over to the couch and shoved me down on it, sitting on the coffee table in front of me.

"Now listen. You're going to go to CD Reshop and get your job back. And then you're going to go out and have dinner with Hikari and Taichi and myself, your _friends._ And then we're going to a club, and you will have fun. And you will forget that my brother has... been... urgh. You'll forget all about it, just like I'm going to do. Okay?"

Tears of frustration were burning my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. Fuck that. I'm not crying anymore. All I did was shake my head, but he grabbed me and forced me to nod. Damn him. Damn everybody. He wiped the tears out of my eyes with his thumb, practically poking me in the eye. It hurt, but it doesn't matter. I don't care if things hurt anymore.

"Fine," I grumble. No point in fighting. I don't want to anymore.

"Good," he smiles. I turn my head away and glare at the floor.

He looks like Takeru.

He's right, though. If I forget about it, I can be happy again. Unfortunately, every time I hit that point of 'Hey, I'm happy,' I think 'Why am I happy? Takeru is gone.'

At least Taichi and Hikari didn't yell at me. They both just kind of punched me in the arm. Hurt, too. Ow. Must be a Yagami thing... but that's okay, I didn't mind. They were both glad I was back, anyway.

Takeru wasn't mentioned once in the conversation. Hikari sat next to me at dinner and leaned against me, burying her head into my shoulder while I was trying to smoke another cigarette... so I think she knows. But she didn't mention it, and I'm glad... very glad, because I just didn't want to talk about it. I couldn't completely remove it from my mind, but I could pretend to everyone else that it didn't bother me.

I can't fool anyone anymore. I used to be able to lock everything away and no one would notice if I was upset. I guess everyone just knows me too well now.

Either way, I was sulking and making love to about seven cigarettes throughout dinner until finally Yamato confiscated them and glared at me. I don't know why, I mean, he was smoking too... I think it's just because I went through so many, but whatever. Anyway, I sulked some more and leaned against Hikari and tried to pretend nothing really mattered. Oh, I also had this awesome noodle dish that was quite yummy.

And then Yamato dragged me into some fucking dance club, and before we went in I swore to have a bad time, but when we stepped through the door and there were lights and music everywhere, suddenly everything melted. I don't know, I can't explain it. It's just that for that moment, I was thrilled with life and everything. The music zoned everything depressing out of my brain and I relaxed.

If there's any mistake I've ever made that tops my running away, I made it that night.

I'm in the middle of a club and my energy is running extremely high again, and I was dancing and all... and I kind of ended up dancing with this guy. He wasn't even all that attractive. I don't know why I did it. And I don't know why my mind didn't scream out 'What about Takeru?' when he leaned over to talk in my ear and asked if he could buy me a drink.

I said yes.

Yamato was already over at the bar (surprise, surprise) with Taichi, and Hikari followed me over, giving me a warning glance. I don't care that she doesn't approve.

I don't know his name. I never asked, he never told me. He handed me a drink and I grinned.

Hikari tapped me hard on the shoulder, and I turned my head away from the guy for a second and growled at her to leave me alone. She glared. I glared back. Finally she stomped off to grumble about it to Taichi or something.

I went back to my drink, and the guy whose name I don't know.

He started getting pretty friendly if you know what I mean... as in he was practically groping me like all get out. I pushed him away the first time, but after that I stopped caring.

Here I was, standing in a crowded club, being groped by some nameless guy while my boyfriend – ex-boyfriend, I guess – is probably being groped by that fucking Potato guy at the same time. And I don't even like clubs. Give me a warehouse rave any day of the week. The music is starting to suck anyway.

I started feeling pretty sick. I'm not sure if it was because the rush I had earlier was practically faded by now or what, but my head was spinning and I felt like I might puke. Staggering over to Yamato and practically collapsing into his arms, I coughed. "I don't feel so good."

He shook me slightly and peered at me through the multi-coloured lights. "You don't look so good either. What's up, you drunk?"

"Nah. I only had one drink. I'm just sick, I think. Something I ate maybe."

"You wanna go?"

I nodded, then shook my head a bit. "You can hang out here some more. I'll go by myself. I think I need... to think." I scratched my head. If I even could still think.

I stepped outside and tried to stop my head from swimming by taking a few deep breaths, but it didn't really help. I staggered forwards a few steps and stopped to lean against the building again. Honestly, I didn't think I would be able to make it home alone. Maybe I should call for a cab or something. No, wait, I'm still broke. (Note to self, go to bank tomorrow.)

"Hey," I felt a hand on my shoulder and glanced up. Nameless Guy was grinning at me. "You're going?"

"Yeah. I don't feel good."

"Want me to help you home?" he beamed.

I paused. I know what he wanted, but on the other hand I couldn't make it home without him. "Okay."

We only made it a few blocks before he was groping all over me again. I was starting to feel extremely dizzy and weak. Not cool. That drink must have been fuckload strong because it feels like I'm real drunk.

"Hey, wait a second," he leaned in and purred in my ear. Ugh, not now. He pushed me against a wall and kissed me. I shoved with one hand, but I wasn't strong enough to push him away.

Fuck.

He started kissing lower, and I regret having changed into a button-up shirt because it's coming off now.

Fuck.

I can't fight back. I can't even stand up anymore, and I'm sliding down to the ground. I'm gonna end up fucked and I'll be no better than Takeru.

Even if he isn't my boyfriend anymore.

I blacked out before he unzipped my jeans.

..._Hee. I know. I'm mean. .. Don't forget to review _


	5. The Up Arrow

_It's 3:28 AM but I have the next chapter! Whoooo! This was mainly written from 1:30 on. Geez, I stay up late. Anyway, Daisuke is all post-black out and, er, just read it. Disclaimer goes here. R&R please. Don't stay up as late as I do, ever._

Amazingly, when I woke up I wasn't hung over. I expected to be greeted with a splitting headache, but I just felt woozy. I don't remember a thing. "Fuck," I groaned.

A hand pushed itself onto my forehead. "Don't get up," a voice ordered.

"I wasn't planning on it," I opened my eyes and blinked up at the ceiling. I was back at Yamato's apartment. It was still dark outside. I hate blacking out because you never know what happened. I stayed there, staring at the ceiling for a few minutes before tilting my head to the side. I expected to see Yamato, but instead found myself faced with a different blonde.

I don't know what the fuck he was doing there. And I said so. Quite loudly, in fact, as I jerked up into a sitting position. That was a bad idea, too, because my head started spinning as soon as I moved too fast.

Takeru reached over and shoved me down onto the bed again. "Would you stay down? Geez."

"Well, I'm _sorry_ but I didn't exactly expect to be faced with _you,_" I grumbled.

And then I made another discovery. Hey! I wasn't wearing any clothes. Funny how something like that can avoid detection. I guess my mind isn't totally un-fuzzed yet. "Takeru! Why the hell am I not wearing any clothes!"

"Would you relax?" he folded his arms and frowned at me. "I'll explain everything if you just shut up."

"Fine. I'll shut up. Because you have a fuckload of explaining to do," I snarled. "Start with why I'm not clothed and follow up with what you're doing here, and we'll see how I feel about continuing."

He sighed. "You don't have to be so angry."

"Yes! I do! Just start explaining, okay?" All right, so I was being nasty. But I was angry. No, I wasn't angry. I was just hurt, but I'll be damned if I let him see that.

He turned away from me in the chair and stared at the wall. "Well, for one thing, you're not wearing any clothes because you threw up on yourself on the way home, and I had to put them in the wash. I would have put you into new clothes, but... well, I just didn't."

I leaned up on my elbows. "I threw up on myself? When?"

"When I was bringing you back here – which is also the answer to your second question about why I'm here."

"No, that doesn't answer it. Why'd you bring me home? Home from where?"

He turned his head and frowned at me. "Don't you remember _anything?_ And lay back down."

"I'm fine like this. Remember any of what? Let me think." I stared up at the ceiling once more and pulled my thoughts back in. "Let's see. I was at... a club. And then I got sick and I left and... oh. Shit. Shit shit shit," I sat up.

"Lay back down," Takeru's voice was almost a whisper. "...He didn't do anything to you."

I buried my face in my hands. "Yes. Yes he did. I blanked out and I couldn't stop him, and... Oh God."

"Daisuke, listen to me. He didn't do anything to you. I didn't let him."

I jerked my head out of my hands, which made me feel dizzy all over again. "What?"

"You heard," he was whispering again.

"You stopped him?" I tilted one eyebrow down in confusion. "Wait, where do you come in on all this, anyway?"

He sighed and turned to face me again. "Hikari called and told me to come down to the club. She said you were... with some guy... and she demanded that I show up and everything."

Scratching my chin slowly, I tried to think. She probably called him after I told her to go away and let me have my drink. "Oh. But you didn't show up."

"Yes, I did. But I couldn't... say anything." He got out of the chair and started pacing the room, in the shadows where I couldn't make out more than his silhouette. "I saw you, and I saw the guy, and you were drinking and having fun and... it wasn't my place to step in."

"I wasn't having fun," I mumbled, still scratching my chin in thought. "Funny. I only had one drink but I got real fucked up. Also funny, I don't have a hangover. Very strange..."

"I don't think you were drunk. Was there ever a time you set your drink down, or stopped paying attention to it, or anything?"

"I never set my drinks down..." _Did_ I ever look away from the drink? Not that I remember... "What does this have to do with anything, anyway?"

The shadow shrugged. "I think he spiked your drink with something."

"What, you mean with royphenol or something?"

"Probably not that, exactly, but something. I don't know, maybe he poured NyQuil in it or something. That knocks you out pretty easily."

I grinned slightly. "NyQuil doesn't make me puke," I pointed out.

"Well, no."

"Forget it. I don't want to talk about it anymore anyway. You were telling me a story. What happened?"

He started pacing again. "Like I said, I showed up and you were with this guy and having fun and all... and I just melted into the background and sat there feeling sorry for myself. And Hikari found me about fourty-five minutes later and told me you were leaving and I had to hurry.

"By the time I drug up the courage to go after you, you were gone. But I figured you'd headed back here, so I started walking here hoping I'd catch up to you."

"And you found me while Nameless Guy was groping on me?"

"Yeah." He shrugged, or maybe he shuddered, I'm not sure. "Anyway, I yelled at him to get off you and, um. I kind of hit him. Hard."

"What?"

"He wouldn't back off so I punched him."

"You _punched_ him?"

"What are you so indignant about? He was gonna fuck you!"

I bit my lip. "I wasn't indignant about it... I just... thought it was kind of funny."

"Yeah, well, ha ha." He returned to the chair and glowered at me. "Be more careful next time."

"There won't be a next time. I hate clubs. I'm never going to one again." I slumped back down to my elbows and sighed. "So what then, huh? Why'd you even come after me?"

He pushed blonde hair from his eyes and shrugged. God. So beautiful. "After I punched him, he grumbled and stalked off. I guess he wasn't going to fight for you or anything. And you, well, you were out of it, so I dragged you back here. On the way, you puked in a gutter and got a fair amount on yourself, and when I got you here I took your vomit decorated clothes off, put you in bed, started the laundry, and then came back here and waited for you to wake up."

I eyed him. "Is Yamato back yet?"

"Are you kidding? It's 2:35. He won't be back until at _least_ 4."

Leaning back against my pillow, I sighed. "...You aren't done explaining yourself."

"No, I'm not. But I think I did a fair amount of explaining, and now it's your turn. Who the hell was that guy?"

"What does it matter who he was? It's not like we're dating anymore."

"It does matter. It matters to me."

"I don't _know_ who he is, Takeru. I don't know his name. He bought me a drink. He groped me all night long. He wanted to fuck me and that's all he cared about. That's who he is, okay?" All this yelling at him wasn't helping my head, which was starting to hurt from all the spinning.

He got very quiet. "Sorry."

"No, don't be. Well, be sorry, but for another damn reason. That guy was _my_ fault. I'm an idiot and I deserved it. Fucking forget it, okay?"

"Don't call yourself an idiot. And don't blame yourself, either."

"Takeru, I said _forget it._"

"Fine. God, you're so immature sometimes," he shoved out of the chair and started pacing around again.

Immature? What the hell for? Because I don't want to discuss being practically raped? Who the hell cares what you think. Why don't you leave me alone and go fuck that goddamn Potato guy some more?"

"His name is _Otayo!_ Not Potato! Don't be an ass." I growled, but before I could snap out a response, he added, "And I didn't fuck him, either."

"...You didn't?" I sat up again.

"No, I didn't."

Dammit. I chewed at my lip until it started to bleed. Now I _really_ feel like a jackass. "Damn, Takeru. I'm... what the hell do you mean you didn't fuck him? What was all that I saw this afternoon?"

"You saw what he wanted, but I didn't go through with it, okay? I'm glad you came to the door when you did. Because if you hadn't I probably would have fucked him and I really didn't _want_ to."

I stared at the black figure. "Come sit down again," I mumbled. He didn't move. "Takeru, come here. Sit down. Now."

This time he obeyed and sat down on the chair, leaning his elbows on his knees and burying his face in his hands. "I didn't... I didn't know what to do. You left and I didn't know where you were. Nobody did. I was so scared. And then Otayo showed up and I knew that he wanted to get with me, but I told him I wasn't in the market. You'd come back to me. Eventually, you'd be back. I knew it. And I told him to not even bother because I love you, and... he said we'd just be friends."

I wiggled over to the edge of the bed until I was sitting in front of him, curled up in the blankets. He said love. Not loved. Present tense. "Go on."

"...He didn't leave me alone. He kept hitting on me, no matter how many times I tried to make him stop. And finally... he kissed me... and I didn't know what to do. He kissed me and I left. I didn't want to talk to him. But then the next day he came over and I figured maybe he realized that I was serious, and I let him in... and I was staring at the wall and I looked at the calander and it was December 13th, and I said, 'That's Daisuke's birthday,' and he said 'Forget him,' and started kissing me... and I thought... why isn't he back yet? It's his birthday... his fucking eighteenth birthday, why isn't he here, or why hasn't he called or anything? And... I didn't fight back. I let him kiss me. I let him do whatever he wanted. I didn't care anymore."

I put my hands on his and pulled them away from his head. "Look at me." He lifted his head slowly and I saw all sorts of emotions in his eyes I didn't want to see. "Go on," I whispered again, holding his eyes with mine. My God. He was crying.

"He... then the doorbell rang and I almost didn't answer it, but I did anyway... and I saw you and suddenly I realized what I'd done. I'd given up and you were right there in front of me. I panicked. I was really scared. I was afraid of what you'd do if I explained and... I don't know. I thought you'd be mad at me."

"Well, I was. Christ. How could I not be?"

He dropped my gaze and stared down at his feet. "Daisuke, I don't know. I... I know you're angry and all but... I didn't mean it."

I exhaled a slight laugh. "Go on."

"After you left... I... He tried to kiss me again and this time I remembered that I was supposed to fight back. And I yelled at him and I kicked him out. I almost went looking for you, but... I was..."

"Afraid," I finished for him, still whispering.

"Yes," Takeru sniffed. "I didn't... want to lose you again."

I took a deep breath and sighed slowly. "God, Takeru..."

"Please, please don't be mad."

I looked down and realized I hadn't let go of his hands from when I pulled them away from his face. I finally dropped them and put my hands on his cheeks, tilting his head up to look me in the eye again. "I'm not, Takeru." Carefully brushing the tears away, I smiled. "God. I'm not mad. How could I be mad? I practically did the same thing. It's... it's not your fault."

He frowned. "I'm sorry anyway."

I shrugged lightly. "All right. Apology accepted. I'm sorry for tonight."

"...Apology accepted."

"Good. Then we're even." I let go of his face and sat back. "I only have one last question."

"Go for it."

"...Did you realize that your calendar was wrong?"

He grinned sheepishly. "Er. Yes."

"...I called you on my birthday." He blinked at me in surprise. "I called, and the phone rang and rang and no one picked up. You were out. With Potato."

"Otayo," he quietly corrected me.

"Potato," I corrected his correction. He didn't argue so I continued, leaving out the part about my nervous breakdown. He didn't need to know all the gloomy details of what went on while I was gone. Not yet, anyway. Not right now. "I called and you didn't answer, and I realized what a mistake I'd made because I didn't know where you were. And you didn't know where I was, either. And I decided to go home, except I was broke. And I finally called Yamato and begged him to come and get me... he drove all the way to the Tokyo prefecture to get me, and then dragged me back. Back here. To you."

His blue eyes locked with mine and I leaned forwards, putting a hand on his cheek. "Takeru. I love you."

Takeru nodded. "I know..." He reached up and placed a hand over mine, holding it to his face. "I love you."

His hand against mine... I missed that feeling. I missed his eyes. I missed... him. "Can I kiss you now?"

"Please do."

Finally. After a month of nothing, I finally got to taste his mouth again. Nothing is sweeter, not even nicotine. Everything melted in that instant. All the angst I had from the last month, everything I'd whined and cried about. I didn't care anymore.

I was home. At last.

Takeru crawled into bed with me and snuggled up. "I missed you so bad."

"I missed you," I brushed my fingers through his hair. My boyfriend. Mine.

"Dais..." he mumbled.

"What?"

"If we ever see Potato again... will you punch him for me?"

I grinned, at both his usage of 'Potato' and the request. "You punched Nameless Guy, why can't you punch Potato?"

"I punched your leech and you have to punch mine."

"Oh. Okay. I'll take immense pleasure in punch Potato, don't worry." I yawned, trailing my fingers through his hair and reveling in the touch. "Will Yamato mind if we sleep in his bed and he takes the couch tonight?" I wondered with another yawn.

"I doubt it."

"Good... because I'm not planning on moving for another several hours."

Takeru smiled at me. "Shut up and go to sleep."

I did. I remember how last night, I fell asleep feeling warm and full for the first time in a month, and I thought that would be the best sleep I ever got. Nope. This night... this was the best. It always will be the best.

_One more chapter. We'll get to meet Potato again, don't worry. Hmm. I'm actually satisfied with this chapter... amazing. (I'll probably hate it in the morning.)_


	6. Victory At Last

_I know it's short... I just lost my flow for it. I got depressed and busy and just bleh in general, but here's the final part anyway. R&R please. Typical disclaimer goes here. for author alerts and for Daisuke's weird journal. Yep. That's... about it._

_Two quick responses to reviews – The reason Daisuke ran away instead of just going to Takeru's or Yamato's is because, if he disappeared, the first place his parents would look would be his boyfriends. And if he wasn't there, they'd check all of his friends. So he had to leave for somewhere they wouldn't know to look for him – s'why he went off to Tokyo._

_Aaaaand to the person who made the comment about kissing people who vomited - I didn't even think of that. D Although he hadn't _just _vomited – it was about two hours or so. So maybe the taste would have worn off. But I won't make excuses, I seriously just didn't think about that._

The next week slid by in a weird way. I went home. Surprisingly, my parents weren't even mad. My dad didn't say anything, not like I really expected him to. Mom cried for probably seven hours straight. It was insane. Anyway, I finally went into my room and flopped down on my bed. My room. My bed. My walls, my floor, my CD's, my bass... everything was mine.

I used my shower. My shower. And my toilet. And I opened my windows, even if it was snowing outside. My God, I was home and it felt good.

Like I said, it was the best and the worst choice I ever made.

I went down and sat in my car. I just sat there. I grinned like a moron and poked at the seats, and then turned on the stereo and just snickered to myself. So I'm dumb, but I wanted to take full advantage of being home.

My mom made a big deal about me telling her whenever I went somewhere from now on... and I reminded her that she's not always around when I leave... and she says, "Leave a note, then." Fine. I'll put up with it for a while... but hell, I'm eighteen now. I have freedom. Freedom.

I put on my blades and skated down to the bank. I took the long way because I wanted to see the town again. Yeah, it was cold, but I didn't really care. Anyway, I finally got some cash out of my account. I got twenty bucks out and when I looked at it I realized I hadn't felt like twenty bucks was worth so much since I was probably seven or eight years old.

I skated on down to CD Reshop and hung out there for a while. I didn't start working again until the weekend, but I missed people. So I hung around and everyone picked on me, and I made fun of the new kid working there... it was all good. Very good.

That evening I was going out with every single freakin' one of the Digidestined, 'cept Mimi of course. Whora was even coming along.

It was my belated birthday party.

So I went home and changed and left to go pick up Takeru.

I met Potato outside of Takeru's door.

Have you been waiting for this? Have you wanted it? Have you imagined how it will happen, over and over and over again in your mind?

Not as much as I have.

"What the hell are _you_ doing here?" I snarled at him.

He glared down at me. "I should ask you the same thing. Punk. This is all your fault, you know."

"My fault? He's _my_ boyfriend. You're the one who moved in on him while I was gone."

"And _you're_ the one that left," he smirked.

He had a point. But that's okay, because it wasn't about who had a good point or not. It was about me dating Takeru and he wasn't, so there.

I grabbed this little sissy scarf he had wrapped around his neck, jerked him down a bit to my height and slammed my fist into his face. Bwah ha ha ha ha! Oh God, it felt soooo good.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he yelled and scrambled back. That's definitely going to leave a mark.

I didn't move. I didn't say a word. I just glared. He kind of hopped back and forth from one foot to the next, like he was going to argue or fight back or I don't even know what... and then he turned around and left.

Goodbye, Potato.

So Takeru and I went out. And everybody was real nice, even Whora. Miyako hit me on the arm, though, just like Hikari and Taichi did... what's up with that? And why the arm? And why all in the same place? Ow.

And then Takeru came back to my apartment (mine mine mine) and, surprise surprise, I discovered something else I missed while I was gone.

Sex.

He fell asleep all snuggled up in my arms in that cute way he always does. God, he's so damn cute I swear it almost makes me sick. I mean, really. Sometimes I have to swallow a mouthful of vomit. Okay, no, not really, but he is pretty damn cute.

And I'm glad I have him again. And sex, too. I like sex. Funny how I didn't really miss it. It only further proves the fact that I wasn't thinking after I left. I thought about nothing but how I was going to eat that night. What a mistake it was to leave behind all of this great stuff I had... but mainly, all of these great people. Man.

I wish I had a big moral for this, outside of "Don't run away!" But, you know... in a way I guess I'm glad I left. I needed to go, I had to get away. I just wish I'd thought about. Okay, so the moral of the story is "Don't run away, unless you plan everything out and have a lot of money and can get a place to rent and a job and pay all your bills and not starve."

One hell of a moral.

Oh, and also, "When you come back and your boyfriend is being groped by a Potato, just punch him. Don't worry about it. Just punch him."

And "When you meet up with all of your friends again, wear pads on your arms."

And maybe "When you get back and you have sex, make sure you're not too loud because your parents might hear. And don't bite your boyfriend on the shoulder to stop from screaming, even if he does like it, because then he'll moan real loud and that defeats the whole purpose."

Lucky for me my parents went to bed early that night, and also lucky that their bedroom is on the other side of the apartment.

_The end. I know, my ending skills are just suck. But, whatever... pleeease review or Daisuke may get sad and run away again. 99_


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